Summer's here and the usual spring fever, along with the increasing popularity of the impossibly silly Main Arena, have kept the arena numbers down. The average WW2 Arena population on Ferret squad nights was 55 pilots, down from 77 last winter. In response to this situation, the squad has been hosting "guerrilla events" in the WW2 Arena on squad nights. So far, we've simply been keeping a running tally of field captures, and declaring a winner after three hours' time. Have a banana! If these events become a regular feature, we may think up some more elaborate scenarios, but for now it's all about getting bums in seats for Monday and Thursday nights. Ferrets are perhaps immune to the aforementioned vernal malady, as our own average attendance figures went up to a record fifteen pilots.

Spring 2005 saw two new Ferrets join the business: Sgt. York's Avengers squadmate Cuckoo joined up, and the notorious Elltee (a.k.a. Ltjgmn) has joined us on Sunday nights for Squad Select Series events. On the other side of the ledger, the Ferrets bid farewell to Mr. Nuker, who left us to join his Uncle Juice in the 352nd FG.

My thanks and congratulations to 2ndLts. Twinky and Aggie for passing the six months' service mark with the Menacing Ferrets this quarter; and also to 2ndLt. Joystc and Lt. Snofox, who've been flying with us for two years now. Time's fun when you're having flies!... or something like that. Salute, gents! We're honored to have you with us. Now, go re-wax my fuselage: you missed a spot.

Seven Ferrets were promoted within the squad last spring: Weedo, York, and Cuckoo each earned their Flight Sergeant stripes and a permanent spot on the Ferrets' roster. Meanwhile, Joystc, Twinky and Aggie earned their rich, buttery, Second Lieutenant bars. The drinks are on you, but the good news is that I've doubled your salaries. Please, don't thank me, you deserve every penny.

A thousand huzzahs to our score-whores extraordinaires, Maj. Andrew and 2ndLt. Aggie, for their respective first-place bomber pilot tour-of-duty ratings in the WW2 Arena this quarter. Here's a pretty ribbon with a shiny thing on it for your pains! As a result of your selfless dedication, and that of countless other Ferrets (well, okay, twenty other Ferrets,) our squad finished, on average, with a sixth-place squad fighter rating, and a second-place squad bomber rating. Dook, you beautiful bastards! Dook!

In Squad Select Series action last spring, the Ferrets finished two series and reaped a passle o' shiny gongs. We won eight medals for our Stuka prowess in the Peacetime Warriors series, and proceeded to outdo ourselves in the subsequent Schweinfurt Ball Breakers series, earning nine gongs, including second place overall for your doting Colonel. Observation: in the unlikely event that you actually survive flying point in a Flying Fortress group, you're bound to blow lots of shit up. We've since played two deadly frames of the latest series, Fleet Action: Coral Sea, having fun driving the boats around, and having even more fun sinking the Lexington and gaining the early advantage. Shame about all those dead pilots, but what's a mere squad of Ferrets next to the glory of sinking one of the climinal Amelican flattops?

Thirty pilots flew the eighth edition of the Ferrets' Challenge. "Bridgespotting" featured the longest course ever, yet ended in a near photo-finish. For his first-place finish, Drache of the Parrots won a free month of WB's courtesy of iEN, and of course the coveted Ferrets' Challenge Blue Ribbon and a fresh bucket of steam. Pistol and E‑b‑o‑ won ten and five-dollar account credits, respectively. Congratulations to everyone who took part, and thanks to =York= for flying the spotter jet, to Cuckoo for reffing after his unfortunate demise, and to SKYDVR for his ongoing help with these events.

In other news, =York= and honorary squaddie =Bcat= earned their wings from the WB's Trainer Corps, complete with the complementary accounts and magical powers that go along with the job. Too good for the likes of us, now, I reckon.

The latest beta version of WB's ironically includes the looooong-awaited C47 transport plane, and also features compatability with the latest Mac/OS build. Troy, are you listening down-well, there?

One last reminder that squad dues for the 2005/06 year are due August 10th. If you ain't got one already, you'll recieve a stinkin' bodge of your very own, soon as you pay up. That's in addition to this year's bribe - err - premium: a spankin-new T-shirt. If there's enough demand, we'll also be selling official reproductions of our eye-catching aught-three tees.

Col. H.C. Rana
Over and Out